There are two sides to every clinging. ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏

You can push something away and still be attached to it.

Today’s essay explores both sides of letting go.

Then: a podcast episode about the fantasy selves that hold us back.

The Resistance

Joshua Fields Millburn

There are two sides to every clinging.

The conspicuous side is attachment. Attachment occurs when you attempt to hold on to something for longer than necessary. Eventually, when the burden is sufficiently heavy, you try to detach from it…

Minimize the clutter.
Leave the career.
Liberate the schedule.
Delete social media.
Walk away from toxic relationships.
Unsubscribe from political punditry.

On one hand, that’s great. But on the other hand, the desire to detach often leads you to the inconspicuous side of clinging: resistance.

Resistance happens when you resent every object that remains after decluttering. When you dread every hour at the job you want to quit. When you bristle at every extant appointment on your calendar.

And it keeps happening when you condemn everyone who continues scrolling their feeds. When you rehearse make-believe arguments with people you no longer speak to. When you seethe at politicians you despise.

Resistance is just another form of attachment: an attachment to non-attachment. When you resist, you’re still organizing your life around the things you want to let go of.

Once upon a time, you clung to your things; now you cling to your judgments about them. To genuinely let go, you must stop holding on and stop resisting.

You can declutter a room without needing it to stay empty. You can leave a job without needing to hate it. You can end a relationship without needing to win every tête-à-tête in your head.

You haven’t let go of something if you feel the need to push against it. Whether you’re holding tightly or resisting, both your hands are full.

—JFM

P.S. The How to Let Go Tour is expanding to 15 cities__. Details in next week’s Simple Newsletter (early ticket access for patrons this Wednesday).

THE MINIMALISTS PODCAST

"Clutter is an audition for a life you don’t want."

Read 7 new maxims in the show notes

EP. 562 | FANTASY SELF

This week, we talk about “sparkler moments,” letting go of fantasy selves, minimalist cleaning brands, a new rule that makes organizing your home easier, and more. Listen on Apple, Spotify, YouTube, or Patreon.